You meet a beautiful woman at a bar and you hit it off. She seem completely interested in, gives you her number and promises to answer your call, and in the moment you feel as if you could fly. After a few days of telephone courtship, a date is booked and the day is now here.
Then comes the text or call if you are lucky, “Sorry something I came up, I can’t make it”. Then begins the mental spiral of thoughts as to why she would change her mind at the last-minute.
Dont be too hard on yourself, a woman flaking on a man is a rite of passage. We have all had it happen to us and if you can show me a man who hasn’t had a woman flake on him ,I will show you a virgin or a liar.
According to my well researched statistics, 1,823,084 men get flaked on per day, which can leave them confused and wondering why do women flake on men.
It all comes down to a lack of interest. I’m sure in the initial phase when you met or communicate over the phone there were sparks of attraction but between then and the date numerous things can happen.
Her mind can start pondering the what if scenarios, worrying that the date could be a complete failure or that the man can turn out to be a creep. With these kind of thoughts fumbling around her mind and you not being there at that moment to reassure her that you are an amazing guy, she takes the easy route and decides to just not come.
So when it comes to a woman’s interest, if you want her to come out on a date with you, that interest must be high enough to overshadow any negative thoughts that she may have about you.
The major negative thought that must be address is safety. She must feel safe. and though Im sure you arent a serial killer, or rapist, well I hope not anyway.She must be absolutely certain you arent going to do anything to scare her or hurt her.
I know it seems crazy but as men we are physically stronger than women, Its like a rabbit going on a date with a bear. When a women comes out with you, in a way she is saying that she trusts you with her life.
How does a man address this? There are two ways.
One way is time, the longer a woman spends talking with you the safer she will feel because time will allow the both of you to build a connection by getting to know each other more in depth. The downside of that however is that if it continues too long, you will be put in the friend zone and you wont get the date anyway.
If you choose that method, keep it verbally on the forefront that you are interested in her romantically, so there is no confusion of your intentions.
Another way to address her safety and comfort concerns is to talk about other women that you interact with. If you have a sister talk about her, if you have a female friend talk about her, if you have a female coworker talk about her.
By doing that, it shows that you have other women are in your life and in that way you have the “Women’s Safety Stamp Of Approval”. This will make her feel more comfortable and decrease the chances of flaking.
You can never have a 100% percent chance of no flaking so it is important to accept that and simply do your best to build her interest up. If she flakes, then she flakes. It happens to the best of us.