We have all suffered a break up, and knowing how to do it and how to handle the after can be difficult, especially the spiral of feelings that follow. At times these feelings can be too much for us and we are drawn back to the person we were with.
Men are particular guilty of this which can make you wonder, Why do men always come back?
Breaking up is Hard
When a man and woman separate, the breakup is rough on both parties. However it is a bit rougher on men. This is because a woman after a break will confide in her friends. Expressing her feelings and getting comfort from her friends. This allows her to get the feelings off her chest which helps with the recovery process.
A man on the other hand is less likely to express his feelings to his male friends due to his pride and society pushing men to believe that being emotional is not a masculine trait. The person that he would express his feelings to, showing his vulnerability with was his girlfriend.
Confused on what to do he will bottle up his feelings. The feelings fester to the point that he can no longer hold them in and the possibility of calling her begins to seem like a great option.
Relationships are an investment of time, money and emotions. When a relationship ends all of that is lost so it is important that when deciding to get involved in one to choose the right person.
Choosing the right person, getting to know them and seeing if they are compatible with him can seem like climbing a mountain. It may feel easier to go back to the relationship that he had than to venture in finding a brand new one.
He can genuinely miss her. A TV show that they watched together, the kitchen they made dinner in, the car they took trips in. Memories of their history together are all around him. The saying “You don’t know what you’ve lost until it’s gone”, has never felt truer.
The feeling that she will no longer be with him and the thoughts of is she now with another guy, Cross his mind. These feeling can be overwhelming especially for men, who tend not to repress their feelings. Causing cracks in his armor and leaking out his desire to get back together with her.
After a drunken night at the bar with his buddies, staring at women and also striking out with them. Frustrated at the reasons why women play hard to get, he sends a drunken text to her, “Hey what’s up?” It is 3am and clearly not the time to be asking that question. He tries to play it cool as if he really wants to converse about life, but she knows the underlying truth. He wants sex.
After a breakup, a man feels that it’s great to be single, that the world is his oyster of women. The word must be out he is single now; the women will all flock to him now, drowning him in a sea of sex. Reality eventually sets in and he realizes that getting laid is hard work.
To go from a relationship in which sex is accessible to being single and sex is not as accessible is a rough change, a change that can bring him right back to her.
A man may come back for one or all of these reasons, but does he deserve a second chance. This is a decision that you yourself must make by looking into if that decision will truly make you happy.